Sat, Jun. 1
... After only one life
There are two types of forgiveness.
Restoration and
Salvage. I mean, in forgiveness, it's always about letting go and not expecting anything in return, right? The best definition I heard is that forgiveness isn't denying that the hurt happened, or saying that it's okay, because it's not, and there are consequences for it. No; forgiveness is acknowledging all of that, and still saying that it's "relinquishing my right to hurt you back."
Restoration is the type that's often the desired choice--as you forgive, you hope and pray to eventually regain some sort of the relationship you had before, even if it's not the same. You want to regain some level of trust, to get back to the place where you can have at least some of a relationship and trust back.
Salvage is the kind of forgiveness where there either wasn't anything to restore in the first place--like forgiving a stranger who's hurt you--or else realizing that there's nothing left to restore. That restoration would only lead to more and more and more problems, and there comes a time when enough is enough. It's still just as much letting go of the bitterness as restoration is, but it's a single-sided thing. With restoration, it takes two to rebuild. With salvage, it's just me. Picking up the pieces of my broken whatever. Reputation, family, relationships... whatever was broken in the hurt... and moving on, without trying to rebuild any bridges. Sometimes, it just gets to a place where that's all that's left to do.
Sometimes, you forgive with the goal of restoration in mind, over and over and over again, and eventually just get to the point where the only choice left is salvage. The restoration has failed so many times and has only lead to more broken promises and more broken dreams than ever, and all that's left is to pick up the pieces while there are still pieces to pick up.
It's an interesting thought. None of it gives me the right to hold on and be bitter; none of it give me the right for revenge, but the idea recognizes the fact that sometimes, enough is enough, and too much is too much.
infinite || abyss
posted at 5:23 p.m.
