Mon, Feb. 16
... No one told you life was going to be this way
Oy. Does this happen to anyone else? Seriously. Let's recap. In the past month... I blew a tire. I had 2 other flat tires. We've locked the keys in the car 3 times. Ran out of gas twice. And then I got the truck. And there's something wrong with the battery. It's needed a boost 4 times in the past week.
Last night, I was driving across the city to meet up with Laurel, and the truck died. I coasted into a gas station, and finally someone came in and could give me a boost. Even with that, though, it looked like it might not start... fortunately it did, but it took a few minutes. I was just glad I didn't have to call AMA (the Alberta branch of CAA/AAA). Again. I should have it programmed into speed dial on my cell phone. There's a limit to the number of times you can use it in a membership year, and I'm rapidly approaching that limit. Fortunately, I'm also coming up to the end of my membership year.
*sigh* Who else does this happen to? Seriously. I've got excuses for being late for anything and everything coming out the yin yang.
And that's just the car. It seems that when things start to go wrong, they all go wrong. And the car is just the icing on the cake. The least personal of the past two months. The easiest to write about, because it just involves a vehicle, not relationships with other people.
You know what's scary? I'm moving in less than 2 weeks, and I'm still not 100% sure I have a place to live. I have options, but nowhere concrete yet.
It's overwhelming when you think about it that way. And by "it," I mean "life." It's just frustrating. I didn't mean to throw a pity party. This was supposed to be a fun "hey, look at my retarded car" entry. Instead, it turned into a "hey, look at my retarded life and how much of a metaphor for that my car is" entry.
I want things to settle down. I told Logan a few weeks ago that if I didn't laugh about all this, I was going to start crying, and that's still true. If I don't find something in life to laugh it, I'll get overwhelmed and bring myself down, and that's the last thing I want to do. There's enough to deal with right now without adding a bad attitude to the mix. But there are days when I just don't want to have to work to have a good attitude. I wish it came easily. I like the days when I feel happy just because. Because this is life and I'm alive, and things are good.
I just have to keep remembering that... that I'm alive, and things are good, and life is okay, no matter how else I'm feeling about it.
If only my stupid car would stop breaking down.
One year ago today: You know, I always have to laugh when I read a review of a romantic comedy and it says that it's "formulaic" and "predictable." Well, duh. Isn't that part of what a romantic comedy is, by definition? There's a different premise, but the end result is always the same. If I want surprises or brilliant acting, I'll go see a drama, or something suspenseful, or something "serious." If I want to see a happy ending, a cute story, and get my fill of *sigh, I want that* moments, I'll go see a romantic comedy. I just think it's funny when people criticize that. There are things to criticize, perhaps, but the predictability isn't it. Maybe it's not the most brilliant film ever, but it's not supposed to be.
infinite || abyss
posted at 12:09 p.m.
