Fri, Feb. 20
... Think of how to use it
It's very quiet and peaceful around here. I was scheduled to work from 6-9, but there's nothing going on here, so I was finished my work by about 7:30. Heh. What a shift, hey?
Logan gets off from Superstore at 10:30, and I suppose I could have gone home and then come back to pick him up, but I decided to hang out here instead. It's quieter. More peaceful. And there's a grand piano that I just spent an hour and a half playing. There are books to be read and scene that I should be writing, and plenty of couches to chill on. And a computer that happened to be left on. I don't have the passwords anymore, since I'm not "office staff." But, you know.
This place is just as much home to me as anywhere else is.
I have a place to live, and I'm not sure how I feel about that. Relieved, I guess, but I don't want to move, so I feel like finding a place is that one last step towards admitting that somehow in the next week, I have to pack up all my stuff and move again.
I sound like a petulant child, declaring over and over and over again that "I'm not going to do it!!" all the while being dragged across the floor, shoes leaving black marks on the linoleum, towards the door. As much as I rant and rave and make a fuss, it doesn't change anything. It doesn't change the fact that I have to move in a week.
The rent is quite a bit cheaper, which is nice. It doesn't really feel like I'm going to actually live there, though. I mean, it won't be any of my furniture--that's all going into storage at my parents'. My dishes and the majority of my stuff won't be there--again, going into storage until after I get back from Europe and move into someplace more permanent. It's like being an extended guest at someone's house. The less I take, the better, to a point. I'm moving out of there at the end of April anyways, so the less I have to pack up then, the happier I'll be. I'd really rather only pack up my life once every six months. You know. Just for the sake of keeping it easy.
But I have a place to live. I'll have a roof over my head, and it's a lot closer to school and work than my parents' house. A little further from work than where I live now, but it's manageable. It's the same neighborhood where I spent the first 2 1/2 years of my Rocky career, so I think I can handle it. Definitely not unfamiliar territory.
I haven't packed anything yet, though, and I'm not entirely sure that I want to.
Because no matter what else I may say about it, I do like my house, and I like my roommates. There are issues, and yes, it will be nice to move away from that, but on the whole, I'd stay there because the good outweighs the bad most of the time. Enough of the time to make it worth it.
But, life moves on. I should be used to this by now. Fifteen roommates later... I never thought I'd have that many. Funny; roommates were never something I really thought about that much. Dorms, yes. Getting married, yes. But living with fifteen people (thus far) during my college career? It just never crossed my mind. Hmm.I guess some things just don't seem that important until you get there.
Anyways, I should go. Logan's almost off work, and I need to lock up before I go get him.
I'm going to miss this the most, I think. No, I don't think so; I know so. Because really, if I get more honest than I'm comfortable with, this is why I wouldn't want to move. The rest is just...
infinite || abyss
posted at 9:47 p.m.
