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Alida: A 23-year-old Canadian exploring the infinite abyss that is New York City.

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I read... ---------- Jade Janna Jen and Mike John Kim Kristy Lara Laurel Lindsey Mia Morgan Robin Lee Shannon Trevor Vron

recent posts

Uncle Richard, me, and James Earl Jones - Tuesday, Apr. 04, 2006
So beautiful when the boy smiles - Sunday, Apr. 02, 2006
One way or another - Sunday, Dec. 25, 2005
Way up high - Saturday, Dec. 10, 2005
Reason to start over new - Friday, Dec. 09, 2005

archives

2005: January February March April May June July August September
2004: January February March April May June July August September October November December
2003: January February March April May June July August September October November December
2002: January February March April May June July August September October November December
2001: May June July August September October November December

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Diaryland
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What to say? He's back, and right now, I almost want to wish he was gone again, but I can't. Things are so crazy, though. They'll never be the same as they were, and that scares me. I want to know what's going to happen, and I want it all to be okay. Right now, it's not okay at all. Nothing's okay anymore. Everything's so screwed up and I'm beginning to lose hope. Even though he was the one who told me never to lose hope. It's so black and dreary right now, though. Kat keeps telling me that things will be okay, that we'll work it out. My head wants to believe her, and my heart longs to believe her, but neither one of them really can right now. They ache and hurt too much to think that anything will be okay in all of this. But life goes on, and I smile, and pretend that it doesn't hurt me as deeply as it does, and I walk through another day, and wait for another night so I can sleep and not think about it all.
infinite || abyss